4 stores and 2 frisks later, I have my Chinese Democracy

… got my five my copies, I won’t share them with anyone, but I can give you the Guns n’ Roses keychains I got along. This is a very special time for me. I am a die hard Gun n’ Roses ( read Axl Rose) fan.

I have been been waiting for this album to come for past 6 six years. Right from the time I read about it on lostrose.com . This album was already the longest running joke in the world of music by then but I started waiting for it so eagerly like its coming the next month.

This wait turned agonisingly long as the time went by. Something told me that it will come someday, but it sometimes seemed almost too incredible an idea that Axl will really ever drop it for his mortal believers. Now that latter part of seemed too incredible to one very close friend of mine.

But this has been a long and hard journey for Axl and all his die hard fans. Especially for Axl, for he wanted it to be something that truely expressed how he wanted his music to be. Some think he took control of the band because he was egomaniacal and want to dictate terms to everyone in the semi-original lineup, but I think it was slightly different.

We have all heard that he wanted Guns n’ Roses to be something that created the kind of music that he wanted to experiment with. And how it all went downhill after that. How his control freak nature pushed everyone to the corner and how it all led to the gradual break up of the lineup that gave us AFD and UYI’s. I just feel more than his wanted to assume total control, it was his desire that Guns try this different style of music that led him to become so difficult for the others to work with. I think he felt that he had a stake in the band which should allow him to take the band in this direction. I think he should have had a major say in what musical direction the band took. Surely not 50% or more, but more than any other individual in the band, including Slash.

The other thing is that when the band started to unravel, he turned insecure. All his true success came with Guns n’ Roses. He just wasn’t sure about his identity as a popular musician without the band’s name backing it. What made it worse was that he never admitted to himself. This denial made thisinsecurity eat into him. And then as time passed, the pressure of the world’s reaction to “The most anticipated album ever” started eating into him. He could no longer go to the people and gauge the reaction to his style. For a negative reaction would seem catatrophic. So he kept on working on his music, trying to attain perfection.

But one man’s perfection can contain a billion flaws in another man’s eyes. He probably never cared about what the average fan would think of this music, but his knowledge of the abstract of the previous line surely didn’t help the matters.